Photo by chaserpaul
Marilyn Ferguson, author of the book The Brain Revolution, said “Ultimately we know deeply that on the other side of every fear is a freedom.”
To experience fear is absolutely necessary to ensure our survival as human beings; it’s fear that stops us from taking a swan dive off London Bridge.
Fear isn’t that helpful when it stops you from making the decisions and taking the action necessary to achieve your desired lifestyle, and the freedom that comes with it. However, fear can be used to your advantage when you change your perception of it. As my favourite success coach Michael Neill, says, “You aren’t afraid of what you think you’re afraid of – you’re afraid of what you think.”
As my wife and I get ready to embark on our LIP lives next month, we’ve been dealing with a few doubts and fears of our own…
Here are a few practical tips that I’ve found useful, to help you overcome the doubts and fears you may have before you leave on your LIP journey…
#1 Select Your Support System Carefully
Sooner or later you will probably tell your friends and family about your plans to leave the country and follow your dreams. Because they care for you, some of them may well project their own fears onto you and cast doubts and fears upon your plans with the mistake belief that they’re helping you.
It is worth keeping a mental note of the friends and family who you know fully support your decision with as much realistic enthusiasm as you have. On the days that you become fearful and doubtful about your ability to execute your plan, stop and think of their words of encouragement and excitment and if needs be, give them a call to get a bit of extra support.
#2 Do Your Research & Learn From Those Around You
Many fears stem from fear of the unknown. Whilst you can never know everything, being as prepared as possible can help to alleviate your worries. Working with a mentor or coach – someone who has done what you’re trying to do – is a great way to get the additional motivation and support you need to achieve your goal.
Whilst your experience is your unique experience, speaking to or working with somebody who has lived through their own similar experience can count for a lot and a good mentor will encourage you, support you, advise you of possible pitfalls to be aware of and how best to avoid costly mistakes.
#3 Have A Plan (and a Plan B)
Whilst you may be dying to drop everything immediately to escape the rat race or your current situation for a life of professional freedom and a more spontaneous lifestyle, in reality, this often requires a lot of planning if it is to be a more permanent lifestyle change than simply a temporary break from reality.
A coherent plan will give you some sort of structure during a period in your life, when you’re likely to be leaving your routine and familiar surroundings behind. It’s worth having people you can trust to review your plans in order to get some constructive feedback. Getting others involved in the planning process will help you realise that you are not carrying the torch of your LIP dreams alone, which can alleviate some of the emotional burden you may be going through.
#4 One Question To Leave Fear Behind
A particularly useful question that myself and Lea like to ask when fear is holding us back is this: “What would I do if I wasn’t afraid?”. When I ask myself this question I tend to find that the answers come thick and fast; with that knowledge comes a sense of freedom and the fear slips into the background.
It’s natural that fears and doubts will come to plague us every now and then. With the help of trusted friends and/or a coach to turn to, we can gather knowledge that will help alter the perception of our fears.
This allows us to create some space in our minds to help us live beyond the fear; it is in this space where the answers to the above question can be found and it is these answers that will drive you forward, through your moment of doubt, onto your exciting life as a location independent professional.
This is a guest post by Greg Hollings, a Wellbeing Coach and regular contributor here who is also about to embark on his own location independent lifestyle with his wife, Claudia.
Really good tips, Greg.
I’d like to add: Imagine your worst fears to the list. This is a technique Tim Ferris talks about in his book. Basically you create worst-case scenarios and then figure out how you’d recover from them. For me a worst-case scenario would be something along the lines of, “Google will ban my websites and I’ll lose all my traffic. My revenue will plummet leaving me penniless and dejected. My boyfriend will leave me for a bleach-blonde stripper. I’ll end up stranded in a train station in India surrounded by wild dogs with just the clothes on my back and a Lonely Planet guide.” Sounds pretty dire, eh? But it’s also ridiculous, nearly impossible and can be solved by a simple phone call and Western Union.
Once you realize the worst that can happen, you realize that you can deal with it just fine!
Hi Never The Same River Twice,
Thanks for your really good tip!
My worst scenario would look a little like this:
The governments of this world (in their infinite wisdom) decree that only registered medical doctors would be licensed to offer health and wellbeing advice, programs and coaching. That too would leave me penniless and somewhat miffed. My wife would leave me for a bleach bonde medical doctor (who is a part-time stripper) and I’d be left naked in a shantytown in Rio de Janeiro with nothing but a sign round my neck saying “Brazil suck at Soccer”.
Now, I’m not entirely sure how I end up naked in a shantytown, or favela as they are known, but it just goes to show how your imagination can run wild if it is fuelled by fear!
But in all seriousness, it’s good practice, as you say, to run through some scenarios in your own mind and, even better, with a friend and/or coach.
Thanks for the comment!
Greg
Since we’re sharing ;-) here is what my worst fears look like…
We end up in a place we really don’t like, feel miserable, start to argue and bicker so much we talk about divorce and what’s worse, the business starts to dry up and because we’re so miserable and stressed about everything else, we can’t focus on generating more business so we feel worse and it all turns into such a miserable circle of rubbishness that we have to go home, get jobs and get stuck living in England for the rest of our lives.
Oh yes…the first part of that actually happened last year. Fortunately the second part didn’t so we’re still here, still smiling and still travelling to the dream destinations we choose!!!